I started to think that I might be to blame for these negative dating experiences. I’m a particular type. For one thing, I’m Jewish. Judaism is not only a religion; it’s a culture. Some of that cultural behavior makes me different and influences how I see others and how they perceive me.  Our humor is as unique as our palate. Granny, born in Kyiv, used to make things like Ptcha (cow hooves—a gelatin-like dish) and Kugel (a pudding made from noodles or potatoes with other stuff thrown in). Granny taught me how to cook.

After two failed marriages, it was evident that I’d been looking for love in all the wrong places, or something like that. I wasn’t certain what the problem was because one husband was a Jew and one was not. Could it be me? As a young adult, I was a rebel, attracted to any man my parents wouldn’t like. I always chose the bad boys. Maybe that had something to do with it.

So, I decided to troll Zotsky for a nice Jewish man. With the television on for a bit of background noise, I rested my Mac book on my lap and opened up Safari to the Zotsky website. It was a weeknight, and Lester Holt was reporting the world’s most recent bad news. I went directly to the Zotsky section that showed each guy’s profile.

A Zotsky profile is limited to what the person wants you to know. Most often, only the most pertinent information is there. Two Zotsky members interested in each other communicate their feelings via the site. Those messages include each person’s photo and profile. Then, they advance to the next step, i.e., communicate by phone, to find out more. Initially, for me, the man’s photo has to appeal to me. Then, the guy can’t be too much older than me or too young. Young ones make me feel like a pervert. Then I consider height. My optimum is 6’2,” but I’ll go shorter if the guy boasts an Advanced Degree or has some other attraction, like a dog with him in the photo. (No dead fish, please.)  Also, he can’t live too far away. 

I found a few candidates that met the above criteria. That’s when I went looking for their religion. Some were atheists; some were agnostic. Several men were Buddhists, and most were Christians. While looking at the various profiles, I noticed that the same men I was considering were looking at me. The website lets you know when someone views you if you’re online simultaneously. Unless you pay extra money to keep yourself hidden, you can’t stalk without their knowing. 

Shit!

Suddenly, my Zotsky mailbox pinged. I’d received a message. I accessed the message box with the click of a key to see who’d sent it. It was from “Saul”. That might only be his screen name…however…who but a Jewish man would choose the name Saul? Do you know what else his profile indicated? We lived in the same town. Most of the potentials that contacted me lived in Boston, New York, or Fairfield County, CT. Then I looked at his age. He was eighty. My profile indicated that I preferred men between the ages of 65 and 75. But, I was willing to give it a try. The photo showed a handsome man holding a young child—probably a grandchild. Maybe he was a young eighty. His message was short, direct, and welcoming.

We should meet, he wrote. He wrote a bit more, and it was evident that he was educated and he could spell. I checked his profile for confirmation.  He was Jewish. 

I decided to go for it.  

© Miriam Greenberg, and the blog Love In The Time Of Corona, beginning April 2022 to the Present. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Miriam Greenberg and Love In The Time Of Corona with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.